Hero to Zero

In 1979, I got my first look at one of the men I would aspire to be like. Michigan State vs. Indiana State in the NCAA championship game. Magic Johnson was my hero from the moment he won the championship and MVP of the game. I grew up just south of Los Angeles, and was a thrilled 10 year old boy when I heard Magic was drafted by the Lakers. I was a die hard Laker fan, and idolized Magic all through my adolescent years. I wanted to be him. I cheered when the Lakers won, and cried when they lost. I lived Lakers basketball. I was fortunate enough to meet him in person a few times and will never forget the encounters.


November 1991, right around my 22nd birthday, Magic Johnson announced that he was retiring from the NBA because he had contracted HIV. When I heard this, I broke down and cried. Something died inside me that day. My hero was struck down prematurely.


I don't think I cried because I would never see my hero in action anymore. I cried because I was let down by him. I had built him up so much in my mind as the perfect model of what I wanted to be, and in one instant, that image was shattered. He had everything going for him. He obviously led a private lifestyle which led him to have to make this decision at this time in his life.


People are like that all over. It doesn't matter if it is a celebrity, your parents, your siblings or pastors or your leadership at church- People will let you down. You will be or have been disappointed by someone you look up to in your life. We create an image of someone based on what is seen or their outer actions. But underneath and in the heart is what that person is really like. Look in recent history. Mel Gibson is an example. He produced one of the most powerful movies about Jesus anyone has ever seen. I have deep respect for his stepping out in faith to produce "The Passion Of The Christ". Last year he was arrested for DUI, and in the midst of the arrest spewed anti-Semitic remarks to the officers. What a disappointment! He is, however, human like the rest of us and prone to sin first. Over on the Grace and Truth blog, Wade Burleson has posted about retired pastor Rick Ousley and an inappropriate relationship he has had with a woman not his wife. Rick, as I have read, is a highly respected minster, revered by those he has led during the years of his ministry and pastor ship. Many people who have built his image up are now picking up the pieces of his shattered image and are devastated. Stories like this are all through history, and many are even in the Bible!


We can have no hope in one another, because in Romans 3 it says-"there is no one righteous, not even one." We will all disappoint someone and we will be disappointed by someone we respect and love at some time in our life. My biological father chose not to have much of an existence in my life, and that devastated me growing up as well. I have found this, however- my Heavenly Father will NEVER let me down or disappoint or forsake me. Our Heavenly Father will always be there for us. This was my draw to be an adopted child of the Most High God years ago. I have not always been an obedient child (which I pay for with the disobedience of my own children:)!) but I know that He never changes. He is there for me no matter what. God is there for all of us, no matter what.


Out of all your heroes, which ones became zeroes and disappointed you?

Leadership

I've always been a sports fan. I could watch any sport, college or pro and get totally lost in the game. Right now, March Madness is happening. The time of year all college basketball teams fight for the right to play for the national championship of college basketball. This is my favorite time of year these 3 weeks of watching endless games. I am a self confessed basketball junkie when it comes to the NCAA tournament. It intrigues me so much to watch how these young men play at such a high level and under so much pressure. These are the times when leaders are made and followers follow.

Having said that, an interesting thing came to my mind as I watched one of the games tonight, the Memphis vs. Texas A&M game. Toward the end of the game, one of the players for
Texas A&M drove around his defender and got to the basket for a seemingly easy layup. One of the Memphis big guys went to block the shot, but had no choice but to foul, which was the foul that took him out of the game. As I watched this young man after being disqualified, he had two emotional choices to make. He could choose to step up and lead by cheering on his team and encouraging them to play harder and fight to the finish; or he could complain about (and to) his teammate who let his man get around him which made him committ the foul. I watched this young man pout and berate his teammate for not defending properly, which caused him to foul out of the game. Obviously this player has some maturing to do. He came to his leadership crossroads and chose the wrong route.

How many leadership crossroads in pressure time do we face as Christ followers? Simon Peter faced his crossroads many times. The most famous is his denial of Jesus. Though he failed miserably, and felt like he should crawl away and give up, God used this as a teaching moment to help Peter grow in spiritual maturity Jesus later restored him as leader of the disciples, and the rock upon who Jesus built His church.

Jesus, in the same way had leadership crossroads to face as well. He was a leader of 12 men who constantly challenged his patience because of their spiritual immaturity and lack of faith. Many times He could have pouted or berated them for their lack of faith and understanding of what He was trying to teach them. He could have easily given up on them and gone on to someone else who would understand what He wanted to accomplish. What did He do? He encouraged them on. He cheered them on. At times He did rebuke, but used the moment to lead and teach to help them grow. He used their mistakes as stepping stones toward growing them spiritually. Jesus stepped up to the leadership role God had planned for Him.

What leadership crossroads have we come up on in our lives? What opportunities will God present to us to step into a leadership role?

Just a rambling thought and observation from a March Madness junkie!

Prayers

I wanted to thank all of you who are following my travel into the mission field, and the prayers that have been lifted up to the Father for my sake. It is overwhelming to know that I have prayers from around the country and the world concerning me.

I have been struggling lately with lifting other prayers up to the Father, because I have been overwhelmed with my own lately, and there are so many other needs that seem more important and urgent than my own. There are so many, however that I tend to run them all together during my busy life. I attempt to stop and pray, in a quiet place in the morning, but my prayers seem to blend and it becomes a general prayer because I lose my train of thought. I know that God knows the prayers before I even voice them or think them. I feel like I am doing the person I am praying for a disservice by praying this way, a hurried prayer.

I have decided to use a technique written about in the M Blog here. I need to write these prayers down and put them in a place where I can meditate on them daily and lift them up to the Lord. I must also carve out time in my day, make time rather than wait until time allows for it. Since I look at and check blogs daily, I will post these prayers on my blog and update them when they change, with praises whenever possible. I am making a committment to pray for those that are in need. As I said, I am so blessed by the prayers of others, I need to give back, and be able to bless others by lifting them up. Please check back for prayer requests and join with me in lifting them up.

We Surrender, All!

Last night, my wife of nearly 15 years and I came together and both felt frustrated by the whole house thing. I didn't know what to do. As you read in my post yesterday, i was beginning to be in a panic. What is God trying to teach me in all of this? We're following His will and plan for our lives, laying down our lives for Jesus and following His plan for us. So why with all the house stuff going on was this getting so frustrating to us to the point we couldn't even think straight? I could only answer with one thing. Open communication, with my wife and the Lord.

The thing that really brought all this panic was the fact that the contract we had did exactly what we had a feeling it might do, fall through. The lady we dealt with was very shaky in our negotiations, and very wishy-washy, hence forth our uneasiness. I was mad, my wife was mad, and we were confused and panicking even more with this news.

That night, after we put the kids to bed, we turned the T.V. off, and sat on the couch to talk. Through all the busy-ness in our lives, we rarely get the chance to talk uninterrupted, and then when we can, we're too exhausted to communicate. (Anyone been here before?) I had been really thinking on how we need to change our attitude toward prayer. I brought up the fact that maybe we hadn't been praying with the right intentions, and surrendering the entire situation to God. Through many tears and a little arguing with each other about how our prayers should have already been good enough for God to have our house sold and we could move on to the next preparations in our life, we agreed that we had submitted and surrendered 90% of the situation, and thought the rest was our deal. We had to hold up our end. I said that even if we gave up 99.999999% of our situation to Him, it wasn't enough. We needed to surrender ALL! We prayed for Jesus to take this burden off us and handle it, that it was ALL in His hands. What a feeling of relief!

Today, as I came home, we received a call from our agent, saying that a lady had drove by our house, and called the number on the sign saying she wanted to look at it that day. She looked, and loved it. She then went to a mortgage lender to see if she could be qualified for the loan to buy, because she really wanted to buy our house. Amazing!

I'm not jumping to conclusions that she is the one who will buy, and close on our house, but God sure showed His power today, and showed His faithfulness to our cries. We will continue to pray and ask God to bless the situation, and trust that His timing is perfect and always on time. I thank you for your concerns, prayers and encouragements through this stressful time in my family's life. Thank you! By the way, does anyone want to help move? Just kidding! I'll take prayer and encouragement any day!

In Christ,
SAM

Patience

You know, talking to others in the mission field, I have learned that they have a great patience. Time does not flow like it does at home, and things do not happen in the same time that we are comfortable with. A simple thing like paying an electric bill takes hours, simply because the people you give your money to at the desk are on their own time, and are not ready to help you. I can see that patience is a much needed thing on the field.

Having said that, our house is still for sale, as it has been since late last summer. We have had many lookers, but not many offers. This past weekend, 3 different couples came through our house. We have had no feedback from any, although it is only a couple days later. I have had a lot of faith that God has it sold already. It has been that way through this whole process and I have had to remind my wife that it will sell in God's time, not ours. I have been patient, until now.

I guess I am starting to panic a little, even though we have until August for it to sell. There is much that must be done in the mean time to prepare ourselves for service, and the sale is the largest of all, and has taken the longest. I am praying that God is teaching me patience, and growing me in this area, and preparing me and my wife for our time overseas. Sometimes I think if I pray any more for the sale, that God thinks I'm doubting Him. Kind of like when our kids ask us for candy, and we tell them "later". They continue to ask, until we get a little annoyed. I know my God has more love than that for me. I know He doesn't get annoyed with us, but like I said, I need to be patient, and completely submit to God on this issue. This lesson will come back to me when I most need it, and I know I will look back on this time someday and think, "what was I worried about? God had that situation all along!"

I Praise you Jesus. I know your timing is perfect, and your plan for us is perfect. Forgive me for doubting that the little things are already taken care of, and help me to focus more on you during this time.

You and I Were Made to Worship

Enjoy the pictures. They speak for themselves. These are the faces of the children of the One True God.

My Call- Part 3: Encouragements

I guess by now, it has been figured out that I am anonymous for security reasons, as the area that my family and I will go is level 3 security with the IMB. And S.A.M. stands for, not very hard- South Asia Missionary. Once we are in our city, I will continue to blog, more on what God is doing in the people of our region and less about us. I think it is important to put our calling into print for others to see, so that they can be encouraged by our story. Because we are simple, ordinary followers of Christ, and He has forgiven, matured and grown us in our faith and relationship with Him, and prepared us for this time in our lives.

With our house on the market, and our application to the IMB in progress, we now prepared for our mission trip to South Asia with our church. The format would be the same as before, except we only taught at one training school. God had my wife and I on this trip, to further encourage us to press on to what He had called us to do. We met a family of six in one of the cities we stopped over in, that were from the U.S., working for IMB. 4 kids ranging from 2 to 15 years old. We were able to see that it could be done. This family was amazing. We fellowshipped with them and had dinner at their place. We knew that God put us in contact with them for a reason. We then traveled to our city, all 7 of us, 5 men and 2 women. We were welcomed by Thomas who took us to our check-in site. We were also introduced to another family working for IMB. This time a family of four, with kids 14 and 11. Another encouragement to us that we could do what God was calling us to do. We will team with this family when we arrive. They are a blessing to us and they will be when we get there!

Our travels through the city were interesting to the ones who had never been. I loved seeing the reactions of those because of the stories I had told them about my first trip. I wondered what they were thinking as we traveled. We visited a village, prayed over and worshipped with the new believers there. It was amazing to see these native people in this village who had been healed of their spiritual blindness by the truth of God's word. It also put into perspective what the team members were preparing to teach, and who they would be teaching. (Man, I need to work on my grammar!) The format was the same as before. We shared our testimonies, and heard some incredible stories of how Jesus had changed some of their lives. We began to teach the CP's who had come from their local villages to learn. We were able to teach on servant leadership. One of our young team members was led to speak, and to model, foot washing. Feet are regarded very different in this region. Everyone takes their shoes off while visiting someones home, but touching the feet seemed off limits in this culture. However, we let God lead, and we washed the men's feet and prayed over them. It turned out to be an incredible example of servant leadership, and it was powerful and emotional for everyone in that room. Not one eye was dry in the room while we did this. It was the most awesome event I had ever witnessed (besides both my children's birth). We thanked God for showing us that He could do anything, anywhere. How could we top that demonstration? God is working on it for me!:)

We came back from the trip again on a spiritual high, and now had crunch time to get our completed application into the IMB. We had 2 weeks to the deadline, and a lot of work to do. We had spent so much time preparing for our trip, we neglected our application. Nothing like waiting to the last minute to prepare for a test! We got everything in, just a little late, but we were approved for the conference at ILC in Richmond at the time we targeted. This is where we would select our job description and get our final interviews out of the way, and receive our OK from the company. What an incredible time! 85 people who had been called to service overseas were there. It was such an outlet to be able to talk about missions and about the area we were led with others who felt the same! Now, we have very supportive church family, but I sometimes get the feeling people don't want to talk about missions as much as we do. Kind of sounds like me before this whole thing started. 3 days of prayer, fellowship and more prayer deepened our encouragement. MLC is the place where our 2 month orientation will be.

God is so good. He prepares us and calls us in His time, when He has prepared us sufficiently. Our next hurdle is to sell our house and unload our debt before leaving. I know He has it sold already. It is just so hard to trust, with it being for sale 9 months, and it hasn't sold. How is it that we need more and more proof that it is Him we need to trust and not ourselves. We do have an offer, one that is very shaky, one contingent on the sale of the buyers house, which has been pushed back a couple times. Another offer fell through because of financing. We have 4 months, and maybe it is God's plan that the house sell just before we leave. One last test, before the real work and trust starts, I guess.

Thanks for listening to this story, which actually is only the beginning! Lots more ahead, and we thank the Lord for our calling and know that all is worked out already, and was worked out before we were formed in the womb. Stay tuned...

My Call- Part 2: A Leading

The first part of this story, I had in mind that I would not be so detailed in the happenings that led me and my family to this point in our lives. I did not want to take so much of someone's time to read about our story. There are some things I have edited for boredom's sake, but once I got started, I just kept going. This next part is the part that gets even more emotional for me, and I hope that translates into the typed word. God is so good!

When I returned from my first ever mission trip, I felt very uncomfortable, and it wasn't just jet lag! I had an empty feeling like there was something else I needed to do about my experience. I knew God was prompting me to do more, but I didn't know what. I had kept a journal of the trip, because I wanted to put it in print for my family and friends when I returned home. About 3 weeks later, I sent an e-mail to all those that contributed prayerfully and monetarily to me going. I got a lot of good feedback. I also stayed in contact with our missionary family, I'll call them the Jones'*, that was back in South Asia, and our partner who hosted us, I'll call him Thomas*. About a month after the trip, the Jones' came home for their stateside assignment, and Thomas* came to visit the U.S.

Our church was holding a reception for him Sunday and I introduced my wife to him. He greeted her with a big smile, and out of the blue, he asked her "How would you feel if the Lord called your husband to full time service in the country I live?" She said, she would have to obey. We had a wonderful time together at the reception. Thomas spoke to the group gathered and told his testimony of how he was called by the Lord out of a comfortable ministry to be a missionary in the poorest state in his country. His parents, who are Christ followers and in the ministry, told him that it was a mistake to go there. It was unsafe. Then one day during his quiet time, he read the passage of scripture that really touched his heart, and touched mine as well. "for, "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent?" Romans 10:13-15. (I read that scripture still today, and it keeps me going toward the goal.) Then Mr Jones* spoke and talked about missions and all God needs is a willing heart to serve, and He will do the rest. I was hooked even more, but how was I to tell my wife? My stomach was in knots trying to tell her in a way that wouldn't freak her out that we are being called to full time missions in a specific area of South Asia. Silence filled the car, until it was broken by her. "You know, I'll go wherever God will lead us." Whew!! What a load off my mind. And what a woman God gave to me!

We decided to talk further of this with the Jones', since they lived where we were called to go. I also felt led to lead a team from our church on the next mission trip to the area, regardless of not having enough time. I decided I would not limit what God had planned in my life. I contacted the associate pastor, and we had lunch the next day, with the pastor as well. I told them I would lead the next team, and he told me there was space for one more lady to go. I immediately told them my wife would go, and I proceeded to tell them why. That she needed to see where we would live because we felt God leading us to full time mission service in South Asia. Both of them fell back in their chairs, mouths wide open, and tears began to form in all of our eyes. I could tell they were so proud of the fact that God was working in the lives of families for overseas service. We sat in silence for a short time, then did the guy thing- "How about that football game last night!" We then had the Jones' over for dinner to grill them about working for the IMB in this particular area, and what to expect. We are greatful for their leadership and guidance through this whole process. So we began our detailed process of applying to the IMB for full time service, as well as preparing for the next mission trip together with another team from our church.

We began our process by telling our parents, my mother first. Our parents do not live in the state we live, they all live 2000 mile west, and are not Christ followers. So, how could we explain to them we were moving half way around the world and bringing their grandchildren with us? That is going to be a problem. We began to pray, and our small group prayed for us. Telling them went the way we thought, they cried, they wondered if it was safe, if we would take the kids, etc. They still don't understand that God had placed this call on our lives, the only decision for us to make was to obey our Lord and Savior. Once we got that out of the way, we put our house on the market. It is still for sale, and for the last 9 months we have shown it. We know God has a plan and will sell it in His time, but we still stress about it!

In my next post, I will continue, as this one is getting looooooong!

My Call- Part 1: A Mission Trip

First, let me explain how I got to be going where I will be going in 8 months. I accepted Jesus as a young adult and have been blessed with the most loving and strong bride anyone could have asked for. My life as a Christ follower has not always bee filled with my obedience to Him. I have made some huge mistakes; ones that I would never repeat. However, I am thankful for those experiences, for through God's grace, those experiences have made me what I am today.

The last 6 years I have really become more of an active member in our home church. 4 years ago, our church held a sacred gathering where the entire membership fasted for 5 days and we met every night for prayer and worship. This was our church body asking the Lord to lead us. We became a globally minded church that spring. We began to reach out with missions overseas, as well as in the U.S. We developed partnerships in several countries and sent many church members who felt called to missions to these places. I had many friends go on these trips. I supported them with prayer, encouragement and monetarily. When some of them asked if I wanted to go, I said not only NO, but HECK NO! That is not my calling. I'm perfectly comfortable to pay, pray and stay out of the way. Missions was for other people, not me.

2 years later, our church sent a team on a vision trip to set up a partnership in the South Asia region, and it made sense, since a family that were members of our church were IMB missionaries in this area. They brought the trip up at church one night, to pray for the team and to give details about the people and the lostness of the land. I suddenly felt something tugging at my heart. I began to feel like I needed to go on a mission trip there. I let it go, however because I heard the enemy tell me I was not qualified or good enough to serve the Lord on a mission trip. When the team returned, they gave their report, and it hit me again. I told my wife, who couldn't believe me either. So the call was put on the shelf again. A couple of months later, the IMB couple who were members of our church came stateside, and talked one Sunday about where they were, the incredible population that didn't know Jesus, and the huge possibilities of working among this harvest. I was hooked. I told God, "I give up. I'll do it!" I wrote an e-mail to our associate pastor in charge of missions for guidance on this situation. I asked him to tell me to go, or talk me out of this. He told me that I needed to obey God's call. He also said not to worry about cost and time, that God would provide that. I agreed and we began, as a 5 member team, to prepare for our trip.

We sent letters to friends and family to raise the $1200 for the trip. In 3 weeks, God sent us $1900. This was enough for my trip, passport, visa and immunizations. I guess God really wants me to go on this thing. I knew He would do something incredible to change my life by me going. I just didn't know what. We were to speak and teach at two different conferences to new believers who were missionaries to their areas and villages around them. I had done no formal teaching and was not much of a speaker, especially not through an interpreter. So this made me nervous and apprehensive, but I trusted God. All our preparations went well, everyone had all their paperwork done, money turned in, shots taken and we were ready to go on this 11 day trip.

When we arrived at our first destination after 24 hours of travel, we were put up in missionary housing to recover and get our feet under us. I began to get a feel for the lostness in the area, though our associate pastor who led us told us that this was not the worst of it. After the ladies shopped for some customary clothing of the area, we flew domestically to our destination city. I got off the plane, and the emotions began to hit me. God had brought me to this place, a calling on my life more than a year ago. Our contact met us and took us to the place we would stay. When we dropped our things off and then were taken to a training center for local missionaries. This was where they did their training. We were treated to some worship music in the local language. My emotions were erupting. I sat there and cried, and thanked the Lord for bringing me here to show me this.

We worshipped with, prayed over and taught 30 men the first two days, and about 25 the next two days. I felt closer to God than I ever had. We were able to visit two villages and a sewing ministry to help the local ladies learn a trade. More worship and prayer in these areas with believers. I came home on a spiritual high, as I thought I would. I thought that God was finished with me, that I did my service project and now I was to get on with my life. I was quite wrong!

To be continued.....

What, Me Worry?

I have been encouraged by a scripture verse I read this morning during my quiet time. "We have no power against this large army that is attacking us. We don't know what to do, so we look to you for help." 2 Chronicles 20:12.

Those that are missionaries in hostile areas can lean on this verse of scripture. It seems that the enemies of the Word are an army against us. We can either worry about being safe, thereby losing some of the ability to do our jobs effectively and witness to those around us for fear of our safety. Or we can do what King Jehoshaphat did in his time of anxiety. He and his people were surrounded by three huge armies waiting to attack. They had two choices, either worry and render his leadership ineffective, or ask the Lord for guidance and strength. He was able to gather the people together and lift his eyes toward heaven and pray to the Lord like they did in the scripture verse.

As we are surrounded by non-believers on the mission field, we need to continue to worship the One who has called us and made it possible to be where we are. We are to be an example to those who do not know our Lord and Savior, especially to those who might wish to do us harm. We must show our faith in Jesus to deliver us in dangerous times, to be able to persevere in the face of hostilities. Sounds easy, but with the help of our Lord, we can persevere.